Saturday, November 04, 2006

The narrow road leads off, into life.

artwork by Satoshi Matsuyama


The place where I stand is narrow. On one side of me determination, hope; on the other desperation, despair. I, in the middle, ask for the golden road, for the place where the river flows. I search for the thing inside myself that would reach for hope, that pushes me to be bigger than what I am. The thing that desires to run, to finish well. But sometimes all I see is what lies down, what is desperate. Is there no wind to set my sail? No fire to show me the way? Is there no greatness in me? Is this meagerness the end? Is this lean existence all of me?
The narrow road forces a dependence upon what I cannot see. I long for the gate to show me eternity, but I also long to live a determined life, to live freely, to live courageously. And I find myself in the narrow between courage and fear, between freedom and bondage. And I see the thing that makes me fierce, the thing that makes me a warrior. Because I CHOOSE freedom, I CHOOSE courage, therein lies my greatness.